Poker and Transporter 2 versus Tony Jaa

Friday night was poker night. I was determined to finish up, since I was down a total of a dollar twenty five over three sessions. So, the buy-in's five. I buy in for ten. I do pretty well for the first two hours. I win two big hands. Then, nothing. For a long time. Finally, I decide that the party's breakin' up, and I need to make a move. I win a small hand, but it puts me up a buck. I have eleven dollars worth of chips. Next hand. J, the dealer, folds. L's in. B folds. T folds. G's in. I'm in. L's drawing to a straight flush from what I can see on the table. It's her first night, and she's not doing great, but she's competent. I know she'd be betting heavier than she is if she was already there. G, on the other hand, has ace high and nothing else showing that's significant to the story but a five. I already saw one ace go out, because T had one. I know he's got three of a kind at most, and I don't believe he does. My hole cards are a pair of Kings. I have a pair of Queens showing, a nine, and a five. I bet the maximum. L follows me. There's just the last card left. G sees me and raises me the maximum, well, because he's drunk. Now, some back story. All night, J's been getting shitty cards. Hand after hand. It really sucked. Three people have misdealt, and each time J's said some funny but cold shit about it, and each time he's made a little scene. Tasteful, but still a scene. He's now dealing, but he already folded. He gives L her face down card face up. Since she's drawing for a straight or a flush, hopefully both, and it's the ace of diamonds, she elects to burn it. Which means she gets another card, face down. G gets his card, face down. I get my card face down. L doesn't get what she needs. I turn a nine. I now have three pair and a five. Kings, Queens, and Nines. Of course, I decide I've got Kings over Queens, and I make the maximum bet, which is 50 cent. G raises me the maximum, 50 cent. So, just between me and G, there's four dollars on the table, not including L's bets to stay in and everybody's ante and bets on the first two cards. So, what's the point? The point is we show them, I have Kings over Queens, and G has two pair, Aces over Fives. So, he wins. The problem is that he immediately begins laughing about how if it weren't for the misdeal, he would have had a pair of Aces. He got the five off of J's mistake. J says nothing. I get a little pissed and say I'm going home. After all, the misdeal cost me six dollars, not to mention what else was in the pot, on that hand. I go home down 4.75$, a 5.75$ swing in nickel poker, and by far my worst performance yet. Because of that misdeal. My problem with this is that basically, I'm the only one who seems ready to dispute this hand. Then, I think: "Shit. Four seventy five for a night out in Irvine is a pretty good deal." Still irritating, though. Them's the breaks. I just hate that I can play well and play the percentages and still get beat like that, and no one blinks. The only one making noise is the one who gained the most off the procedural error. Like a frickin' O. Henry story. That seem right to you?

***

In media related news, I, too, saw Transporter 2. Like Steely, I found it to be entertaining. Everything the first movie was, this was, except more so. If you hated the first one, this one will equally get your dander up. If you liked or loved the first one, then, you're in for more of the same. For those of you who never saw the first one and are considering the second, just let me say by way of spoiler that a car jump involving a crane and a time bomb happens. If that doesn't sound like your speed, then stay away. It's fucking ridiculous.

I was trying to figure out why I like those movies. After all, they are kinda terrible. I figured it out, though. It's Jason Statham's athleticism. The guy just pulls off the stunts with strength and speed. He makes it look good like no one since Brandon Lee has--if'n you don't count Jackie Chan, Jet Li, etc.

Hard cut to me contradicting myself. There is, of course, one guy out there who is neither European, American, or Chinese. Tony Jaa. If you have not seen Ong-bak, then I don't know if I really want to talk to you. This man delivers 110 minutes of non-stop stunts, muay thai, and stunt muay thai. No wires. No bullshit story. Just a guy whose legs are occasionally on fire, kicking you in the neck, face, and head. How many elbow strikes can you watch being delivered to the crown of anonymous thai thugs' heads? Well, more than you think you can. Z, this movie is especially suited to your needs. It speaks to something deep within you. The Phillipino import currently costs 22.99$ at Best Buy. You will not regret it.

***

My evening is shaping up to be infinitely better than my weekend was.